There are 108 days until summer. This is the time of year that we like to lose the clothes, slip on the sandals, bring out the swim suit and head to the local beach or pool. Summer often brings, summer love. That high of heat, your heart beating, and feeling like you never want any of those moments to end. For most people who are 20 years and above, I am sure we can look back on our first summer love and go, “ahhhh, yes, what a feeling”. Want to relive those moments for yourself? Well, think about love for yourself. Love for yourself, what the heck is this broad talking about? Yes, more love for yourself, radiates out to other people. Think of your internal thoughts and energies like a radial tower that sends out a signal to be picked up. To see where your internal love dial is at, here are 7 questions to ask yourself.
1. Start Your Day Happy.
How do I start my day? Do you get up and think, yes, I am so happy I am alive and I am excited to start my day. Do you feel passion about how you’re living your life? Are you thankful for your friends, family, career? If this is not a “normal” routine for you, try it, do a little personal experiment. Pick 7 days, get up and think of 1-2 things that you’re thankful for. How did that feel? Compare it to how you used to start your days. I bet it felt a lot better. You feel lighter, more open to getting the day going. Your day will not feel so much like a chore now, but more like possibilites could be waiting for you.
2. Stay Focused on What is Working.
What do I see in the mirror? Do you look at yourself and think; ugh, there’s a line there that wasn’t before, my lips are too small, I wish I had longer eyelashes, my nose is too big. Ok, yes, but you are you, and there is only one you. Would it not be easier to accept yourself and think damn the colour of my eyes are sexy; or sure my lips may not be as full as I want them to be, but you know what, I can communicate like a champ. My nose may be big, but it attracts a lot of attention from the ladies and it’s a conversation starter. Look at Adam Sandler, the man is not the best looking in Hollywood, but he makes us laugh because of his nose and flaws.
3. Engage in Healthy Self-Talk.
What do I tell myself? Do you say; I am no good, I never get anything right, I can’t do anything right, I am such a loser etc. I get it, I used to do the same thing; thinking I could never finish what I start, I am always behind everyone else, how stupid I was for dating a guy who was borderline abusive and left me with a huge responsibility. I know that did not feel good. There had to be another way to approach things. So, as my aunt always said to me, God gave you a brain for a reason. I began reading. And, after all the geek reading I have done on quantum physics, the power of cells and thoughts, I started implementing bit by bit the wisdom imparted by scientists, doctors and spiritual gurus. Changing the way I talked to myself. Every time I would do something right, I would be like yes! I got it! I finished it! Way to go! As cheesy as this sounds, become your own cheerleader, it feels damn good.
4. Find Like Minded People.
Who am I surrounded by? Do your friends constantly gossip about other co-workers and friends. Are they always looking at the flaws of other people. Or, are the people around you, supportive, uplifting and encouraging. When you have a new goal or thing that you want in your life, do they become cheerleaders for you. Life, is a lot easier when we are surround by people who bring us up, vs bringing us down. Granted, this is not to say, that everything in life is all sunshine and roses, we need challenges in life. Challenges help us appreciate the good that comes along. Challenges build resiliency.
5. Garbage In, Garbage Out.
How do I look after myself? Do you get up, eat a coco and pebbles breakfast. Have a bagel at lunch with an extra helping of cream cheese, then go home, watch TV and sit on the couch all evening. Our North American Society has an epidemic of Type 2 Diabetes, all because we do not look after ourselves properly. It is “easier” to take the convenient approach. But, you know what is not easy? Watching as your loved one dies of cancer, or deteriotates in a nursing home because of Alziehmer Disease. How, we look after ourselves, now, impacts our health later. Our bodies, are similar to cars. What we put in us, and how we move, affects our performance in our daily lives. Start small. Exchange that bagel for a salad, get that small habit going. Come home and walk for 10mins. Do it, every single day. Consistency is power in the long term.
6. Be Perfectly Imperfect.
What do I want to look like? Are you thinking, Kim Kardashian, Channing Tatum. I got news for you folks, they are human, just like us, with flaws. Go figure. Ha. Also, when they are on screen or doing a photo shoot, they have a whole supply of people who help them. Pictures are airbrushed, or a ton are taken for that “perfect” photo. I say, get rid of the idea of perfect, enjoy and love your flaws. Embrace yourself for who you are. Think about what the ideal, you, would be. A few years ago, the thought of aging had me somewhat nervous about the whole concept of getting older and a little “looser”. I thought to myself, well what age do I want to be forever? What do I want to look like most of my life? Hmmmmmm, 25. Yes, 25. 25, you feel youthful, but you have enough common sense to know, you don’t know it all after your first 25 years. And you know the cool thing, I have so many people tell me I look 25 and 26 all the time.
7. Train Your Inner Best Friend.
Am I cutting myself slack? When you don’t get things right, do you beat yourself up. I know I am certainly a criminal of this at times. I have to take a little time to reflect and learn from my mistakes or losses. As my one lifestyle coach, Mair, said to me, “Lita, you are constantly punching yourself, does that not hurt?” Holy cow, yes, yes it does. We are own worst critics a lot of the time. Become your best friend, cut yourself some slack. Take a time out, relax and recognize you have not gotten this far in life with out BEING AWESOME!! Because, DANG IT, being human is not the easiest of tasks.
The most important thing to more SUMMER LOVING, is LOVING YOURSELF FIRST 🙂